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Online Dating

Joanne asks:

I've communicated a couple times with a guy from a dating site but he never asks me any questions about myself. Is that a bad sign?

The phrase "online dating" is a misnomer. It should be called "online meeting." You meet someone online, you exchange emails or IMs or phone calls and then you meet in person and start dating.

I don't think it is necessarily a bad sign that he hasn't asked you much about yourself via email. Meeting someone for the first time can be awkward whether it is in person or online. It is almost cliche to put "excellent written communication skills" on your resume, but written communication is a skill entirely separate from verbal communication. Maybe your guy is not a great communicator in writing, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't make a great boyfriend.

I think that since you have exchanged a few emails, you should meet in person as soon as possible. Don't let the online conversations get too involved before you meet. Reserve your judgment of him until then.



As someone who has met a few people through online "dating" sites, I agree wholeheartedly with PM's advice to meet sooner rather than later - that way, you don't waste too much time if they're a loser, and you get to start in earlier on a relationship if they're awesome. Also, I recommend meeting in a public place and having a couple of your friends around (not necessarily with you, but around) because you never know who you'll meet on the internet.


I would always let things proceed until I was really stoked about the guy, and then we'd meet and I'd realize he was a tool.

So PM's advice is good - meet soon before you get hooked and wind up disappointed.

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